Why did God give me one big mouth to stick my two feet in?

Here is a country song lyric I wrote some time back.

Why did God give me one big mouth to stick my two feet in?

My wife is divorcing me

My girlfriend is mad as hell

Got run over by my truck

My dawg bit me in the tail

Lost that lottery ticket

And its six numbers to win

Shot myself in the toe

Hurt like all kinds of sin

CHORUS:

Cause I drank that moonshine

That cornlikker’s getting to me

Oh, that sweet shine of shines

Sure made a man out of me

2nd VERSE

Went myself a cow roping

Tipped some cows on the sides

Rustled up some of that beef

Pushed ‘em into my double wide

Bull saw me in the pasture

Bull took a liking to me

Now I got a big ole hole

In that place I cannot see

CHORUS:

Cause I drank that moonshine

That cornlikker’s getting to me

Oh, that sweet shine of shines

Sure made a man out of me

BRIDGE:

Why did God give me one big mouth to stick my two feet in?

I’m a-thinking the mouth is lonely and needs two good friends

3rd VERSE

Got myself some Jesus

Off to the church I went

Down came the big ole steeple

They said it was an accident

Now I’m six feet under

And I’m lying where I lie

My mouth’s full of dirt

Toes pointing to the sky

CHORUS:

Cause I drank that moonshine

That cornlikker’s getting to me

Oh, that sweet shine of shines

Sure made a man out of me

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