Chester (A Dog With Issues) Endorses Donald Trump

This one is a big Wow. Uncle Bardie was on the floor, absolutely in histerics.

Almost Iowa

dogI arrived home to a pitiful scene. A panic stricken Scooter had taken refuge on the roof of his doghouse.

Below him, a furry tempest raged. 

It attacked his dog dish, instantly shredding it into a scattering of twisted metal shavings – then it peeled chunks of plywood off his house and reduced them to sawdust. Finally, as I watched in amazement, it ripped shingles from under Scooter’s paws as he danced madly about in despair.

I called my buddy Stan.

What did you toss into Scooter’s kennel?” I shouted into the phone.

Are we talking about Chester?”

Chester is Stan’t psychotic dog.

“Yes… why is he here?”

“Daphne and I are on vacation and you have DirectTV.”

It made perfect Stan-sense.

Chester may be profoundly disturbed but there is one thing that keeps him emotionally stable – subscription television.  Specifically, the dog loves the Home Shopping Network.

So to rescue Scooter, I rushed into the house and cranked…

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