Friday Creator Corner: Maya Lin and the Memorial

Each Friday I feature a Creative Artist on Friday’s Creator Corner. Creativity is the art of making something out of nothing. I leave the post up for a week, then replace it with another post. After taking it down, I link it to Friday’s Creator Corner Artists page.

Today’s Creator’s Corner artist is Designer and Artist Maya Lin:

Hamlet and the Speakeasy

Song for this post. Bugs Bunny & Crew: On with the show, this is it.

I can counterfeit the deep tragedian;
Speak and look back, and pry on every side,
Tremble and start at wagging of a straw,
Intending deep suspicion.
Richard III Act 3 Scene 5.

For Hamlet’s plot till now, see Hamlet So Far.

Act 3 Scene 2. Every actor in the world wants to be the director. With one exception. Michael Caine. Sir Michael knows an easy road when he sees one. He learned during his working-class odd-job early life not to make waves. Directors make waves. Partially because it’s their job to piss people off, especially actors and producers. Partially they can’t help themselves.

Now here’s Hamlet. Right up front he wants to piss the actors off. By telling them how to do their job. Here he’s telling them to speak the speak and speech the speech. As if they don’t know how to speak the speech and speech the speak. They ought to. They have done it something like one thousand and fifty-four and a half times.

That half time is stretching it a bit. This visiting acting troupe hadn’t done a good job at the halftime celebrations of the Superbowl between the Martin Luthers and the Torquemada Inquisitors. They did a bit on the Ninety-five Theses. They called it the Ninety-six Thesis because it was the thesis that the Martin Luthers left out. This thesis claimed that Jesus was six feet seven and had played pro basketball for the Nazareth Carpenters. That went against the Church’s teaching.

According to the Church teaching on Jesus’ basketball career, the Good Lord was seven feet tall and had played for the Bethlehem Cradles. The Church had stained glass to prove it. They had Jesus’ contract for forty-five shekels for his rookie year. He played three games, then he was out for the season. He had injuries in his two palms. Something about splinters. Basically it put him out for good. Jesus never played pro basketball again. A little touch football with His Boys but never anything pro. As they say, everybody has a cross to bear and that was His.

Except for that screw-up, this acting troupe had standing room audiences at all its performances. Now here was the Hamster, an amateur, trying to tell them how to do their job. But he was paying the bill, so they let him do his thing. They just didn’t listen and went about their acting biz the way they always did. Professionally.

Hamlet must have thought he was William Shakespeare. Had Hamlet lived it is very likely that he would have gone to London and started his own theater troupe. Now that would have been a hoot. Not.

Hamlet was so good at tragedy he could have been the next Chris Marlowe. When it came to comedy, it was an ix-nay on that. From the evidence we have seen in the play so far, all Hamlet could do was sad, really sad. He would have made “The Massacre at Paris” look like a children’s play.

The Elizabethans would have run from his plays, barfing. ‘Course that would have made him even more popular since the Elizabethans loved to barf. Francis Bacon wrote three treatises on the subject. Queen Elizabeth, for whom the era was named, had contests at court to see who the best barfer was. Leicester won them hands down. Guess that was why he was the Favorite-in-Chief.

Hamlet would have been the one that all those scholars think was The Bard. Alas, it was not to be. But Hamlet still made his mark anyway. Thanks to Horatio, his story became the most popular in all the world. Folks as far away as Cathay would get a taste of it. It would be seen by more audiences than any other drama, except The Game of Thrones. So Hamlet can take his bow.

Now Hamlet gets the chance to produce, direct, and playwright. Who knows? He may even have played the ghost. Just like William the Playwright played the ghost but not the lead. Oh, that’s right. There isn’t a ghost in the Gonzago play. But no worries. Hamlet has written a part for himself. He will Olivier this little tragedy the actors perform. Talk about Multiple Personality Syndrome. Hamlet was a regular Orson Welles. A Mr. Multiple Personality.

Uncle Bardie’s Movie of the Week: We Have Choices

Once a week on Monday, Uncle Bardie shares a movie with his Readers he gives a big two thumbs up. It will simply be a short excerpt or a trailer. From time to time, a reflection on the movie will appear below the video. This week’s movie is “Racing Extinction” (2015):


20 Reasons Why Uncle Bardie is Old School

Song for this post. Alice Cooper: School’s Out

1.    When people say I am old school, they’re thinking I went to school with Socrates. Well, I did. He flunked philosophy.

2.   I am so old school, I gave Nero his first fiddle. Big mistake.

3.   I am so old school, I was Dracula’s original dentist. I’m sorry.

4.   I am so old school, I was Henry VIII’s divorce lawyer. Henry paid good.

5.   I am so old school, I am responsible for the Leaning Tower of Pisa. I just had to move that brick. It didn’t look straight. Well, it didn’t. After all these years, the Italians still won’t let me in their country. And they say an elephant never forgets.

6.   I’m so old school, I told Ben Franklin, “Go fly a kite.” When he did, he lit up like EPCOT on Christmas Eve. The good news: he came out a lot smarter. After that, he invented bifocals, the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution. He even invented the kitchen sink. So people can now say, “Everything including the kitchen sink.”

7.  I am so old school, I convinced George Washington not to put “In George We Trust” on the money. It just didn’t sound right. By the way he did chop down the cherry tree.

8.  I am so old school, I knew Yankee Doodle personally. He was no dandy.

9.  I am so old school, They wanted to put my face on the one dollar bill. I told them no. I don’t like selfies.

10  I am so old school, I gave Abe Lincoln the stake when he went vampire hunting.

11.  I am so old school, I warned Custer those smoke signals were saying “No trespassing”.

12.    I am so old school, I told James Joyce where to put the periods. And the commas too.

13.   I am so old school, I started the rumor about the pony. You know the one that says, “There’s a pony in here someplace.” There wasn’t. I just like to watch people shoveling poop.

14.  I am so old school, I was the eighth dwarf, Sloppy.

15.  I am so old school, I was the model for Dumbo’s ears.

16.  I am so old school, I was the original Scarecrow in the “Wizard of Oz”. The director said it was typecasting and fired me because I didn’t have a brain.

17. I am so old school, I wrote lines for the movie “Gone With the Wind”. Clark Gable kept tripping over the original lines. So I gave him the line, “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.” To be frank, he really didn’t.

18.  I am so old school, I knew Keith Richards when he was sober.

19.  I am so old school, I started the rumor that Paul was dead. Actually he was. That’s his clone you see up there on stage.

20. I am so old school I know what “groovy” means.

Friday’s Creator Corner: Robert Weingarten, Photographer

Each Friday I feature a Creative Artist on Friday’s Creator Corner. Creativity is the art of making something out of nothing. I leave the post up for a week, then replace it with another post. After taking it down, I link it to Friday’s Creator Corner Artists page.

Today’s Creator’s Corner artist is Photographer Robert Weingarten: